January 30, 2007

Snow It All

Cold Weather Lexicon

Thought winter would slide by without dipping below 30? Think again. The weather has a language all its own, so we’re offering a lexicon dedicated to Old Man Winter.

belting point
n. The location under your parka where your waist would be if you hadn’t spent the season bulking up for hibernation.

cold feet
n. The act of skipping out on work at the first report of snow, only to find out the storm missed you by several miles.

cold frontin’
v. The act of baring cleavage, no matter how cold it gets, to look like a hottie at the bar.

handy wipe
v. When you’ve used the last tissue and have nothing left but your hand. (Sal, hand me a tissue. I don’t want to handy wipe before this meeting.)

lip stick
v. The act of getting caught on your mate’s unbearably chapped lips.

mitten kitten
n. The evil fairy who steals one mitten or glove from your coat pocket every winter.

sknowman
n. The ski bum you’re currently shacking with who updates you daily on ski conditions. (Sorry I’m so late. My sknowman hit Sunday River yesterday and kept me on the phone for hours.)

tendenitis
n. A disorder suffered by those who tend to wear ridiculous heels on icy sidewalks.

Still trying to beat the winter blues? Check out today’s Washington, D.C., edition for more cold-weather wordplay.